A Brief History of Conducting a Choir and Firing Up a Canon

When I first moved to Grande Prairie, Alberta, in August, 1988, part of my new employment was the position of Conductor for the College/Community Choir.  This was a group of adult singers, about 50 of them, who rehearsed together every Tuesday night for 3 hours.  Although I was excited to conduct this choir, the experience would end up as one of the worst in my professional life.  

When I was hired in the spring of 1988, I had no idea whatsoever of the political hornet's nest I was inhabiting, until one dear friend advised me that the "bag ladies" were after me!!!!  BAG LADIES?  They were, indeed, and numbered about 25 - 30, at least half of the choir membership.  Feeling the urge to sing elsewhere, with a conductor who was one of them, they departed unceremoniously after our last concert.  

Although my stint as conductor was not very successful, I did meet many new friends who have enriched my life in this city.  One of those new friends, Judy, someone who likes to fiddle with new cameras, volunteered to show me all the ropes involved in operating a camera and uploading photos.  

So tonight my photographical education began, and who knows what the future will bring?  I promise not to put too many cat pictures here, because they only sing when they purr, and I don't really call that "real" singing.  And besides, my niece (who gave me the camera) despairs after reading too many cat tales...she prefers turtles.

Oh, by the way, this year I am singing in the College/Community Choir, along with my friend Judy, and it is so nice to watch our wonderful conductor doing all of the work!  

Ha!!!!!!!!!!  Judy, my friend, has performed the impossible.  I now know how to operate my new little camera, I think.  Wonders will happen from now on as I become smarter.

I AM BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Finally I am back at my blog, after wandering the halls of "Nomansland" for 24 hours, bothering the frazzled nerves of my niece, and just generally getting super annoyed!  I am back!  I am back!

Of course, when one signs in, as was requested, it is always beneficial to use the CORRECT EMAIL address, idiot!  But I DID figure out, all by myself this morning, that I used the wrong address.  No wonder I had no blog anymore.  But now I do.

Now it is on to all things house- worthy before lessons tomorrow, because this place was seriously ignored yesterday and is in need of serious attention. 

Cleansing Thoughts as I Prepare For Another Year of Making Music

Before starting a new school year with one's singing and musical theatre students, one ("one" being moi, the teacher) must have accomplished at least some of these chores:

                 Vacuum cat hair off of newly cleaned carpet

                 Dust cat hair off of newly laundered slipcovers, because laundering them doesn't 

                         necessarily do the trick.

                 Mop cat hair off of the walls and doors, or using whatever to accomplish this

                 Dust off thousands of pieces of music that haven't been looked at all summer

                 Dust off the piano, also not looked at (well, not meaningfully)

                 Insert fingernail file into slot between piano keys in order to latch onto long strings of                         built up cat hair.  Slowly withdraw said cat hair thread, hooked onto fingernail                               file;  be careful - some threads are the length of a cat's tail (well, not a Manx).

                        

                Organize all of the new choir music which has taken on a life of its own, on top of the                          entertainment center, while acting as Linus' summer bed-cool- off  cushion.

                

               Give up the notion that one will have sewn a new concert dress before Sept. 8 

                       and instead, aim for Halloween; my new concert dress is black, after all,  & I could                        become the witch "they" (definitely not my students) truly believe I am.

               *        

               *          

               Begin looking over one's shoulder, in case one has ceased to do so over the summer

                       holiday, so to avoid too many nasty surprises throughout the year.

                     *  *  (Note the extra space 2 lines above; I have no idea how to fix it).

               Get a "With-It" haircut in order to camouflage advancing years.  That being done 

                       today, complete pre-making-music-year tasks by: 

              FOR SURE, SIT HERE AT YOUR COMPUTER AND DISREGARD EVERYTHING ELSE.

So, only paying particular attention to the last item on the list, I am happily not doing anything listed above in lower case type.  I KNOW that I work best under pressure, you see, and with a full two days to go before my students come through the raspberry front door, there is PLENTY of time for everything (not on my list) to get done! 

 Can I help it if all enthusiasm waned  as I nursed a cracked right ankle and bruised and beaten

 other leg, for nearly 4 weeks?  Can I help it if a pothole upended me whilst jay walking (running, actually), resulting in 4 weeks of enforced procrastination?  Rehabilitation, that's it, and  prescribed rehabilitation (prescribed by moi, that is) specifically excludes any working type contact with  walls, carpets, dishes, windows, ironing, laundry, cooking, and cleaning the oven (but it's a self-clean, you say - but owner is too scared to turn on the high temp button, for fear of a fire)!  I could, as little Kaylyn dictated to me, "turn on the dishwasher," but "I AM THE DISHWASHER, Kaylyn, and I am not turned on!"  

As for the "with-it" haircut, and with asymmetrical being "in" (as per Kate of Jon & Kate, etc.), that is what I have now.  Well, it is always asymmetrical,  because one side grows twice as fast as the other, but now it has been  professionally preened,  and I am WITH IT!  If the kids don't care for my haircuts, the question asked is, "Did you get your hair cut?"  However, if they approve, then it is a "Oh, I LOVE your haircut!"  I'll bet my 4 cats that they don't know that I know so much, but advancing years have enlightened me.   (They'll discover that same enlightenment in their lives, too, in 2075).

Actual guilt is setting in here, so maybe, just maybe, those dusty eyelet sheers will end up in water, soap, and pummeled by an agitator other than the usual ( ie: climbing cat claws).   Did you ever wonder why cat owners choose eyelet fabric for their sheers?  For those not in the "know," eyelet is full of manufactured holes, so what better choice for cat owners?

Yes, sheer guilt overcomes me,  so with my  new "with-it" haircut and now-nimble legs, "I am yours, my Whirlpool!  Coming, dear."  

(If lines jump all over as you view this piece, so be it.  I have absolutely no idea in hell how to fix lines that are stuck on a pogo stick).                       

A Badly Behaved Backdoorigan Discussion

As I prepare for the new season of making music with my wonderful students, I am made aware again,  that there are a few badly behaved backdoorigans (you know, those entities on this planet who choose not to enter through the front door - "frontdoorigans") in this town.  So I find myself trying to figure out how I will deal with these badly behaved backdoorigans; perhaps I will discover a viable modus operandi  as I write here this evening.  If not, I will have saved myself a trip to the shrink, if I actually had one.

For over 20 years, I have been blessed to have supported myself in a career that I love and actually can do pretty well.  Throughout the past 20+ years in this city, I have taught 24  provincial winners (1st and/or 2nd places) in singing, choir and musical theatre.  Before my professional life brought me here, to the north pole, I taught many more provincial winners, so I do have a record about which I am very proud.   In addition, my students have enjoyed themselves most of the time, I think, (no, I am not deluding myself, you know who), and have actually learned something along the way.  Many enjoy successful careers in music and/or the theatre.

Beginning on Tuesday, my students will enter through my front door, painted with a luscious shade called "Raspberry Trifle."  (Mmmmm, that sounds good right now).  To this date, I do believe that no one has ever tried to enter through the back door, because they KNOW.....they really know that being a backdoorigan would not be tolerated here.  Even the cats don't go near the back door, but they could care less...the front door is much more welcoming for them - that's the spot of choice for greeting kids.  But I digress; kids are not the problem here.

A few years ago, well actually 9 years this summer, I was happily ending my teaching year and looking forward to a relaxing holiday...NOT.  One mastectomy later, along with the bleeding ulcer going on in a stressed stomach, I wasn't feeling exactly well.  Eventually, all was well again, but unbeknownst to me, a badly behaved backdoorigan had invaded my little world.  Try as I might,  I just couldn't get that back door to close; my recent illnesses playing a significant contributing factor.  Nine years later, though, healthier and wiser, I must prevail here.

 A new year will begin for me on September 8, and tonight that damned back door blew open again, even more!  I mean, the first kid hasn't even entered through the raspberry trifle  front door to even BEGIN  the new year.  Give me a break, badly behaved backdoorigan; at least let my year START before you blow through!  (I don't think that backdoorigans have ears; rather,  they grow an inordinate amount  of tentacles......long, summer near-Arctic days being the host's best friend). 

These last precious days of summer, before my kids arrive, are usually spent in hot pursuit of a clean house, the one time of the year that it is transformed into a  truly habitable hovel.  I vow that tomorrow I will continue this tradition, and to hell with the backdoorigan.  Perhaps a solution genie will magically poof out of the Mr. Clean bottle tomorrow and life will return to pre-2001 status.  (As I dream on).

For sure I will find some way to permanently lock that damned back door this year, and I can blissfully go back to what I do best...teach kids and feed cats.